Ten Days of Awesome…

I’m kind of sad that I have to go back to ‘normal’ life now.

It feels like I just had this really incredible ten day love affair with like six different really hot lesbian characters, and we laughed, and we cried, and we plummeted head-over-Converse in love, and then had lots of really amazing sensual sex with brilliantly artistic cinematography… Yeah okay, so maybe I had forgotten what it was like to see a movie that could suck me into the story so completely and keep me engaged for the entire duration of the film, and not enrage me at all by all of the usual annoying heteronormativity and vile sexism! Basically, the equivalent to thinking that your lactose intolerant, then being offered some amazing, creamy, succulent cheesecake, eating the whole cake, and rather than feeling sick, you discover, you feel better than you’ve felt in weeks!!! You’re not lactose-intolerant your just allergic to bullshit!!!!

In other words, the Melbourne Queer Film Festival was everything I could have hoped for, and more! I was able to see four features, one ‘documentary’ and three shorts packages, so like, a lot! I mean, I wish I was able to see more, (obviously)… But I did have to go to work occasionally in the last two weeks, and due to my work life being ‘occasional’ and all, I wasn’t able to cough up enough dough for a full festival pass *sigh*. But realistically, after this festival, I think I should just quit my day job and get on the script-writing wagon! Well maybe not quite yet. But here’s a promise, I am going to write, direct and co-produce a short LGBTQ film in the next couple of years- and I’m not just saying it! It will happen. These last ten days have been truly inspirational. I even wound up with a new favourite movie, and this is big, HUGE actually, because my favourite movie has been the same for the last SEVEN years and I thought it would never be replaced! Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, sorry love, but you are now number two, NUMBER ONE: A PERFECT ENDING (2012) Written and Directed by Nicole Conn.


In fact, I am so in love with this movie I am going to purchase a copy of the film, watch it at least twenty more times and then write an in-depth review of all its awesomeness, layers upon layers of awesome: awesome writing, awesome acting, awesome casting, awesome filming, awesome editing, with awesome sexy sauce on top. But I won’t give any spoilers here, just watch the film, see for yourself. It’s fucking awesome.

Anyway, the shorts packages I got to see were Short and Girly, Transphats, and Mixtape, and the features were Mermaids, A Perfect Ending, Bye-Bye Blondie, I Do, and Peaches Does Herself.

They all had their pros and cons, but overall there were so many more pros than cons. I mean, did I mention that Amber Benson was in one of the shorts!???! TARA!!!!!!! And it was about being allergic to love, well cats actually but come on, in the lesbian world… it was hilarious.

It made my day.

Actually it made my week!

All of the shorts were really beautiful and powerful. And I was really amazed by how much each short film could do. Many of them were crammed with positive messages that came out through brilliant dialogue and crept out of the silences, through the acting, from the cinematography. They really made you think about sexuality and gender and love just as much as some of the features. I would recommend every film I saw, well, except peaches does herself because honestly I don’t really like peaches music and it was more like a feature length music video than a documentary. Some of the dancing was quite interesting, people in full-bodied pink suits coming out of a giant vagina, and the orgy scene, and of course I loved the inclusion of the beautiful naked “pretty boy” of which peaches became infatuated with because (to peaches) they are the perfect combination of ‘dick’ and ‘tits’…  But I just thought it was going to be a documentary about why she peaches does what she does, where her inspiration comes from, why she writes such repetitive and provocative lyrics. Don’t get me wrong I think she does some radical things and breaks down binaries and *some* stereotypes in this film, but I just find her lyrics so annoying! Why sing the same sentence for the entire song?! Sorry peaches fans, but I just don’t get it!

My other small disappointment was in the film “I Do” because I was really excited that it would be bringing a gay and a lesbian character both into the spotlight. But for me, all of the female characters conformed to unflattering stereotypes and didn’t have much personality or drive. They were just character foils for the main gay male protagonist. But at least his character and storyline were really adorable and well-acted. I loved that his relationship with Mano was presented so sensualy and romantically. I think the film succeeded in sending the message that gay men can be romantic and monogamous and family oriented just like heterosexual married couples. Basically it said, look, we’re not that different, we can be just like you, so let us have the same rights! But in a cuter, funnier, and more entertaining way.

But if you are able to purchase and/or watch any of these films, A Perfect ending, Bye-Bye Blondie, Mermaids, Quiet (short), One Night (short) and Do you have a Cat? (short) were my favourites from what I saw (all lezzy films though)! Pfff- I’m not biased at all! 😛

A Perfect Ending was my absolute favourite though and I recommend it to anyone and everyone regardless of your gender and/or sexual orientation. I think everyone can enjoy this film because it has an amazing touching story, and all of the components come together so magically.

So Melbourne Queer Film Festival, filmmakers, contributors, volunteers,

Thanks for all the Awesome!

xx, HJL


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